Not sure what I'm doing blogging here, but I just feel like there's something I should be doing. My 12 year old dyslexic son just starred in a play. My 14 year old is entering high school and my daughter is entering middle school. My wife just started working again.

And me? We'll, I'm a teacher and I guess that means that every day is something new. A new unit. A new lesson. A new kid. A new problem.

Don't get me wrong. I love me life. I got here by "repotting" myself at the age of 40 (thank you John Gardner) and I feel incredibly comfortable. I can't imagine not being a teacher or not being a father. It's just who I am and what I do.

Yet, there's always a next stage and mine seems like it should be coming. We have 7 years before all the kids are off to college, so perhaps I'm a bit premature, but there is more to be done in the meantime. I'm almost 50. I'm reasonably good at what I do and I'm always trying to do it better, but those projects aren't the next stage.

"The next stage" is the winding down of life. . . I think. (remember this is stream of consciousness)

Am I slowing down? Perhaps. There's definitely a "stop and smell the roses" aspect to life these days. Every day with Emily, every day she flops down on my lap with an exasperated "I'm bored" is a wonderful day. I'm no longer doing doing doing like some of my college-or-die students. Also, I just don't have the drive to deal with difficult people or situations any more. They can find someone else to change the world. . . or even the school.

But I think slowing down is too simple a metaphor for what I'm feeling. As dad says, life is not about what you do, but who you are, so maybe it's just that I'm feeling a movement to a new "who I am"?

What would that entail?

camping?
hiking?
leading?
creating?
talking to people I don't know?

blogging??